Updated: May 26, 2020
sketch 2019 'blood stone' - a small part of what I set out to consider in my current project. watercolour and biro on papr.
When it comes to life in general I think I’m quite decisive. But when it comes to my painting I am somewhere between meanderer and ditherer.
If I set out to achieve something I ultimately will, but because I can’t determine what that outcome is in my art I find I redefine my purpose continually in response to whatever I am making at the time. In part this is a strength: I follow my intuition; but in part it is also a cop out : ‘well this is what the paintings wanted to be’.So, I if things don’t work out as I hoped I alter my intention.
It’s a recipe for a relaxed and easy life; not a great recipe for a sense of achievement. Its like going to climb Everest and deciding half way to go round it instead because well ‘that will do’.
So I have decided I want to suggest an end result and be able to get there, through determination, trial, error or whatever, but get there, nonetheless. This fills me with a bit of trepidation. Am I simply setting myself up for failure?
And yet my mind won’t let me not do this. I have to have some sort of shape, form and ultimately purpose to what I am doing, however pleasant it is to simply paint and draw and enjoy it.
Hence this project.
Now I need to determine what that project might be.